The Film Doctor's Ten Most Disliked Films of 2008
This was one of those films where I sat in the theater wondering whether there may be something more interesting elsewhere in the Cineplex. Jessica Alba got an eye transplant where she can suddenly see spooky things. I couldn’t even review it.
9) Iron Man
Many raved about this film, and I confess I enjoyed watching Robert Downey Jr. unsuccessfully try out the jet propulsion boots. Otherwise, the film struck me as endless metal crashing, pinging, and banging on metal. The most poignant moment—Jeff Bridges’ bald head looking scrawny and swamped by his big knock 'em sock 'em robot outfit.
8) Get Smart
This film confirmed my suspicions about the decline of modern man. Women will survive and prosper. Men won’t. It may not be such a bad thing.
7) The Love Guru
See Number 8. Again, poor Jessica Alba.
6) Step Brothers
See Number 8 and 7. Further proof. There is no hope.
5) Charlie Bartlett
A vile rip off of Wes Anderson’s Rushmore, even down to the minor characters and the shot composition style.
With long dyed hair, Nicholas Cage tries to look soulful in a clumsy Thai hit man flick that you can’t even enjoy on a campy level. What is going on in Cage’s mind? Why is he in these films? Why are there so many of them?
3) Death Race
Watch the men race. Watch the camera zoom in and out. Race, race, race. Die, die, die.
2) You Don’t Mess with the Zohan
If you are not convinced by the argument concerning 8, 7, and 6, Adam Sandler should remove any remaining doubts.
1) Mamma Mia!
A deeply disturbing film in which middle-aged people writhe endlessly and grotesquely to dated pop. Views like a bad acid trip.